Smelly Cat.Two of them kissed last night.Grandparents.Don't.Barnyard Animals.Bi-Sexuals.A Song That Means A Lot To Phoebe.Babies.Blackout.In The Shower.Cremated Mother.My Coma Guy.Love.Bodies.Terry's A Jerk.Crusty Old Man.(Chorus)
Smelly cat, smelly cat
What are they feeding you?
Smelly cat, smelly cat
It's not your fault
They won't take you to the vet
You're obviously not their favorite pet
You may not be a bed of roses
And you're no friend to those with noses
There was a girl we'll call her Betty
And a guy let's call him Neil
Now, I can't stress this point too strongly
This story isn't real...
Now our Neil must decide
Who will be the girl that he casts aside?
Will Betty be the one who he loves truly
Or will it be the one who we'll call L-L-Lulie?
He must decide, he must decide
Now grandma's a person who everyone likes
But lately she hasn't been coming to dinner
And last time you saw her, she looked so much thinner
But the truth is she died, and some day you will too
La la la la la la la la la la...
There'll be times when you get older
Just to make them like you
But DON'T, cause
That's another thing that you don't wanna do
Even though I made him up, he must decide
GRANDPARENTS
She bought you a train and a bright shiny bike
Now, your mom and your dad said she moved to Peru
DON'T
When you'll want to sleep with people
That's another thing that you don't wanna do
Oh the cow in the meadow goes "moo"
Oh the cow in the meadow goes "moo"
Then the farmer hits him on the head and grinds him up
And that's how we get hamburgers
Nowwwwwwww chickens!
Sometimes men love women
And sometimes men love men
And then there are bi-sexuals
Though some just say they're kidding themselves
La la la la la la la la la la...
I made a man with eyes of coal
And a smile so bewitchin'
How was I supposed to know
That my mom was dead in the kitchen
La la la la la la la la la la...
They're tiny and chubby and so sweet to touch
But soon they'll grow up and resent you so much
Now they're yelling at you and you don't know why
You cry and you cry and you cry
And you cry and you cry and you cry
New York City has no power
And the milk is getting sour
But to me that is not scary
Cause I stay away from dairy
La la la la la la...
I'm in the shower and I'm writing a song
Stop me if you've heard it
My skin is soapy and my hair is wet
And tegrin spelled backward is nirget.
Lather, rinse, repeat
Lather, rinse, repeat
Lather, rinse, repeat
My mother's ashes,
Even her eyelashes,
Are resting in a little, yellow jar.
And sometimes when it's breezy,
Or if I'm feeling sneezy,
And now I...
Excuse me! Excuse me!
Yeah, noisy boys!
You don't have to be awake to be my man
As long as you have brain waves
I'll be there to hold your hand.
Though we just met the other day
There's something I have go to say...
Love is sweet as summer showers
Love is a wondrous work of art
But your love, your love, your love
Is like a giant pigeon
Crapping on my heart
La la la la la la la...
And they found their bodies the very next day
They found their bodies the very next...
Terry's a jerk!
And he won't let me work!
And I hate Central Perk!
(time passes by...)
And you're all invited to bite me!
...And the crusty old man said
"I'll do what I can"
And the rest of the rats played mara